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Post by Suzy on Feb 10, 2014 10:58:42 GMT -5
It's that time of year and St Valentine's day is looming. All the magazines and newspapers are full of ads for roses and chocolates and everything heart-shaped.
In our house, this day is usually preceded by both husband and me going around saying: 'it's a really silly thing', or 'we don't need that stuff, let's not do anything'.
Then one of us cracks down and buys a card and a gift and some red roses (usually him), leaving the other one (usually me)feeling terrible but very cross that he didn't stick to our agreement.
But this year, I'm going to buy him a pressie and some of his favourite chocolates and cook a very special meal and put roses on the table. And I won't be cross if he hasn't done anything.
He just walked in the door saying he wouldn't. And I nodded and said 'it's really a silly thing'.
I wonder what'll happen?
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 10, 2014 11:53:34 GMT -5
<grump grump grump>
I totally resent Valentine's Day. Feels like something manufactured by card companies to squeeze money out of people and make singles feel bad. That said, I try to remember to get a card, 'cause if spouse gets a card and I don't, I feel like a heel. Of course, if I get a card and he doesn't, he feels like a heel. Yeah, great holiday.
/rant
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Post by Suzy on Feb 10, 2014 11:55:35 GMT -5
<grump grump grump> I totally resent Valentine's Day. Feels like something manufactured by card companies to squeeze money out of people and make singles feel bad. That said, I try to remember to get a card, 'cause if spouse gets a card and I don't, I feel like a heel. Of course, if I get a card and he doesn't, he feels like a heel. Yeah, great holiday. /rant Something like that goes on here too. And then he thinks he has to, even though I tell him he doesn't. Deep down, I feel it's all very silly and commercial. |
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 10, 2014 12:01:58 GMT -5
<grump grump grump> I totally resent Valentine's Day. Feels like something manufactured by card companies to squeeze money out of people and make singles feel bad. That said, I try to remember to get a card, 'cause if spouse gets a card and I don't, I feel like a heel. Of course, if I get a card and he doesn't, he feels like a heel. Yeah, great holiday. /rant Something like that goes on here too. And then he thinks he has to, even though I tell him he doesn't. Deep down, I feel it's all very silly and commercial. If both members of a couple enjoy celebrating it together, that must be really nice. A great chance to spend some one-on-one time together and rekindle the romance. But the cultural expectation that of course you celebrate it -- that's what bugs me. For example. My nephew is in a newish relationship, and his girlfriend made a huge stink about his going to his cousin's wedding because she doesn't want to be alone on Valentine's Day. No V Day = one fewer chance for a controlling, insecure person to shoot herself in the foot.  |
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Post by Suzy on Feb 10, 2014 12:06:36 GMT -5
Something like that goes on here too. And then he thinks he has to, even though I tell him he doesn't. Deep down, I feel it's all very silly and commercial. If both members of a couple enjoy celebrating it together, that must be really nice. A great chance to spend some one-on-one time together and rekindle the romance. But the cultural expectation that of course you celebrate it -- that's what bugs me. For example. My nephew is in a newish relationship, and his girlfriend made a huge stink about his going to his cousin's wedding because she doesn't want to be alone on Valentine's Day. No V Day = one fewer chance for a controlling, insecure person to shoot herself in the foot. Oh God, that sounds really silly to me. I think that perhaps couples like my son and his wife might like to celebrate it as they have three small kids and both work full time. They never get to spend time alone. I remember those days, when you didn't actually get to have a real conversation because we were both so busy. So we used to go out on a 'date' once a month. |
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 10, 2014 12:12:39 GMT -5
If both members of a couple enjoy celebrating it together, that must be really nice. A great chance to spend some one-on-one time together and rekindle the romance. But the cultural expectation that of course you celebrate it -- that's what bugs me. For example. My nephew is in a newish relationship, and his girlfriend made a huge stink about his going to his cousin's wedding because she doesn't want to be alone on Valentine's Day. No V Day = one fewer chance for a controlling, insecure person to shoot herself in the foot. Oh God, that sounds really silly to me. I think that perhaps couples like my son and his wife might like to celebrate it as they have three small kids and both work full time. They never get to spend time alone. I remember those days, when you didn't actually get to have a real conversation because we were both so busy. So we used to go out on a 'date' once a month. Yeah, we're in that period and try to take date nights. But we see more of each other than many couples because the academic schedule is so flexible. We work at home a lot, so we're not both out of the house for nine hours/day, then coming home and dealing with kids for a few hours, then going to bed exhausted. For instance, I'll be driving to work at about 5 p.m. today because my classes are late. Still, I remember this time, before kids, when a weekend day would start, and I'd be like, "So, what do you want to do today?" And he'd be like, "Dunno, what do you want to do?" Cause, you know, we could do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. Now I look back on that and can't really fathom it.  So, yeah, having culturally sanctioned non-kid time is good. |
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Post by vrabinec on Feb 10, 2014 13:44:44 GMT -5
The wife and I are toning it down this year. No jewelry, or anything. We'll go out to dinner and exchange cards. That'll be it. Hopefully she'll take me up to the big room. Usually, I send flowers to her office, but she told me explicitly not to this year, so I guess I won't.
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Post by Suzy on Feb 10, 2014 14:04:27 GMT -5
The wife and I are toning it down this year. No jewelry, or anything. We'll go out to dinner and exchange cards. That'll be it. Hopefully she'll take me up to the big room. Usually, I send flowers to her office, but she told me explicitly not to this year, so I guess I won't. Card&dinner, isn't that enough? Plus, you have to tell her how amazingly gorgeous she is. That'll get you to the big room... |
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Post by Daniel on Feb 10, 2014 18:49:33 GMT -5
It sounds corny, but every day is like Valentine's Day for us. We both work from home, so we are together nearly 24/7. That would drive a lot of couples I know insane, but we've been doing it for years. I give her chocolate and tell her she's adorable all the time. I'm not sure what we would do for V-Day that would be different.
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Post by cbedwards on Feb 10, 2014 19:00:41 GMT -5
The wife and I are toning it down this year. No jewelry, or anything. We'll go out to dinner and exchange cards. That'll be it. Hopefully she'll take me up to the big room. Usually, I send flowers to her office, but she told me explicitly not to this year, so I guess I won't. It's a trap, Vrab. C'mon, you know better than that. |
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Post by mlhearing on Feb 10, 2014 19:14:33 GMT -5
We don't have a "bog room" anymore.
Here's the deal: I'll buy her a present so she won't protest when I buy myself more of that Bigfoot beverage I mentioned.
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 10, 2014 23:18:38 GMT -5
We don't have a "bog room" anymore. Here's the deal: I'll buy her a present so she won't protest when I buy myself more of that Bigfoot beverage I mentioned. That sounds like a good deal, Michael, but I must say, " bog room" is a somewhat horrifying typo ...  Daniel, that is absurdly sweet.  |
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 10, 2014 23:19:13 GMT -5
The wife and I are toning it down this year. No jewelry, or anything. We'll go out to dinner and exchange cards. That'll be it. Hopefully she'll take me up to the big room. Usually, I send flowers to her office, but she told me explicitly not to this year, so I guess I won't. It's a trap, Vrab. C'mon, you know better than that. Naaaaw ...  |
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Post by vrabinec on Feb 11, 2014 8:47:15 GMT -5
The wife and I are toning it down this year. No jewelry, or anything. We'll go out to dinner and exchange cards. That'll be it. Hopefully she'll take me up to the big room. Usually, I send flowers to her office, but she told me explicitly not to this year, so I guess I won't. It's a trap, Vrab. C'mon, you know better than that. I'm pretty sure we had this same conversation last year, and I caved. Good thing the old threads got wiped out so nobody can go back to verify that we're repeating ourselves. |
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 11, 2014 10:07:58 GMT -5
It's a trap, Vrab. C'mon, you know better than that. I'm pretty sure we had this same conversation last year, and I caved. Good thing the old threads got wiped out so nobody can go back to verify that we're repeating ourselves. No, you're right, I remember that! |
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Post by Suzy on Feb 11, 2014 11:51:29 GMT -5
That must have been in the Bistro. The Pub was created just before St Patrick's day (March 17) I'm going to have a party here to celebrate! Can't believe we're nearly a year old!
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 11, 2014 18:15:41 GMT -5
That must have been in the Bistro. The Pub was created just before St Patrick's day (March 17) I'm going to have a party here to celebrate! Can't believe we're nearly a year old! Are we really?! Wow! |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 11, 2014 20:50:18 GMT -5
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Post by Becca Mills on Feb 11, 2014 23:19:25 GMT -5
See what I mean? It's an evil holiday! |
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Post by Suzy on Feb 14, 2014 14:29:19 GMT -5
Valentine's happened early in this house.
First, my husband announced that as a special gift to me, the heating was turned up a full two degrees C, so I'd be warm and comfy today. (he tries to save on oil by telling me to 'put on a sweater' when I complain)
Then he took me out to lunch as he has to work late tonight. As agreed, there was no exchange of cards or gifts.
But then at the end of the lunch, he hands me an envelope with a huge grin. 'It's for both of us,' he said. Inside, I found a trip to the south of France in May...
So, yes that was a very good Valentine's day...
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